THE DENTIST

What is the best way to start telling a horror story?  

"The dusty untouched steps leading up to a creaky unstable door welcomed all, dead or alive"

No

So today I went to the dentist, luckily I know the dentist in question so I was able to get in quick, as I'm away with work next week, thought I better get this new and unusual pain sorted out before I'm in a strange unwelcoming place, only joking, going to Nottingham.

As I was at an advantage knowing the dentist, you would have thought that i would feel completely confident in their ability and not be scared as most people are... But I'm forgetting that most people are confident with the ability of the dentist, or they wouldn't be a dentist, for too long anyway. I am also forgetting the face that most drugs wouldn't stop me being scared of the dentist, i hate my teeth being played with by anyone!

Imagine for a moment that your watching a satirical TV sketch show, where characters are in a waiting room for the dentist, and while their waiting they hear the violence of the reputable drill, well my dentist is actually exactly like that!

The waiting room has the usual green hard waring carpet that actually extends to climbing up the front surface of the reception desk. Why I don't know, either there was some clever research done on what people find aesthetically pleasing about carpet creeping up to slowly engulf the receptionist just before she offers you a better Dental Plan, or the carpet fitter was having a laugh.

I have always wondered why anyone would let the people in the waiting area listen to what is actually going on in the dentist room, including the conversation about the patient having a friend who has made a sugar free cake! down to the grinding and absurdly terrifying drill! The door to one of the rooms, was actually open, and you could hear everything, including the dentist drilling in time to his favorite classical tracks, only about five of them, looping over and over again. At this point i feel for the staff, imagine everyday putting up with the same pieces of music, with the same cake conversations.

So my dentist is the most wonderful relaxing dentist I have ever been to! and thanks to her I survived!  turns out I has a hole in my tooth and after a very entertaining moment with my face turning into rubber after an injection of local anesthetic, it was all sorted!

I love the way that local anesthetic keeps on spreading after you have actually walked out of the dentist, an hour after the dentist my left ear went completely numb, I could have had any number of facial surgery all today, and not felt a thing!

One of the worse things is accidentally biting your tongue, and then later on feeling the pain!

OK I've vented!

At one point i actually heard a dentist say to his patient: "If you had to guess which tooth it was which one would you say"  Don't you know? your a dentist!

Twitter

OK so this is my second..... umm update.

And have discovered I like talking to myself, and will continue to do so.

So Twitter... I have only recently discovered twitter, thanks to (like many people) Steven Fry coming out of the Twitter closet on Friday night with Jonathan Ross.

So I hoped on...

Although I am now a fully fledged addict, that did not stop me noticing that strange effect Twitter has on celebrities.

Anyone who has heard of the phenomenon "Dr Footlights" might appreciate the addiction to performing. I am not going to go to deeply into my opinions on this, but lets just say that the buzz that some celebrities get from performing, leaves them completely drained.

When they get home the opportunity to sit at the computer and have thousands of people tell them how amazing they are will give them a little bit of that buzz. Its like having a constant audience ready and waiting for you to pop on line and say hello.

Just a few hours after registering on Twitter I realised that some celebrities were really becoming addicted to twitter, and to be fair to certain people I am not going to mention names, but I really do worry about their personal life, as the amount of time logged on to Twitter amazes me. I'm wondering if this person is aware that, I now know the name of their daughter, and the village where they live. If I have noticed this information without even trying, what if one of the 72,000 followers are.

The audience is there, ready and waiting, and it is an opportunity to connect to people, and.... no...not perform, but to feel appreciated.

I believe that Twitter will become more and more popular, and will very soon go rotten, and there will be people who will be able to take advantage of the accessibility, something will go wrong somewhere and many people may turn away from twitter.

Well good luck to Twitter and the Celebrities caught in the net...the spiders coming!

the first blog

I have pondered blogging many times, and have had the urge to spout off like a kettle with the on button stuck down with some blue-tack, not that I ever did that to see what would happen... nor did I get found out, then grounded for a good while until I paid for a new kettle!

I have always loved writing, although had problems thinking about what to write about.

Remembering standing staring at all the new shiny pens in WH Smiths on a Saturday when I should have been looking after my fathers stall, and wanting to write.

I would get a brand new book, and pen, and would sit there for ages thinking about what to write and then would give up and draw a picture of a spaceship of something.

Right sort yourself out Dean, this blog isnt about how you love writing, this blog is about what is going on now, and the thoughts you have day to day...

OK, so I've started, with a pretty good intro... and now I am going to eat!